From the Book: INGREDIENTS OF A SWEET MARRIAGE Chapter One vol.1
THE WORD OF GOD is the foundation for a successful marriage. Jesus told a parable of two builders. The first man built his house on a sandy soil, and because there was no proper foundation ,when the wind and storm rose and beat against the building, it collapsed. of this, the bible records: “great was the fall of it.” On the other hand, the other man took time to lay a proper foundation and the storm and winds of adversity that pulled down the house of the other man who built his house on sandy soil could not pulled down his own house-he had a solid foundation; he built his house on a rock (Matt.7:24-27).
Every marriage goes through tests, but what would keep your marriage in time of test and trials is a good foundation. Any marriage built on the foundation of God’s word would stand the test of time. If you must make progress in marriage your foundation must be solid. If your foundation is not solid you can not build a visible marriage.
The word of God gives blue print for building a successful marriage, which if followed would lead to marital bliss.
The divorce rate in Nigeria now is heading to 45%, whereas in the USA is as high as 90%. Some get married and divorce the day after. This happens every now and then, but something must be done about it. You need to discover the truth about a successful marriage if you must enter into it. That’s why the bible says, “Buy the truth and sell it not.”
In order to deal with the subject of the marriage management for a blissful union, we must begin by defining some important terms relevant to a full understanding of a subject:
1. FAMILY: This is a group of people who are closely related to each other. This includes father, mother, sister, brother, son, daughter, and all kin.
2. MARRIAGE: This is a union of two people who has mutually agreed to form a family unit. But nowadays some called pastors are joining same sex people in marriage; let me make it clear that marriage is a union of two people of opposite sex who have mutually agreed to form a family unit. When a man and a woman has agreed to live together mutually-not by vision or prophecy-then they can become a married couple. Tribe has nothing to do with Christian marriage’ neither does financial status.
“when a man
and a woman
are head to
heels in lust,
you see them
3.LOVE: This is to care very much for somebody (Longmans dictionary of contemporary English). It means to show extreme care for somebody else. When you say, “I Love you, “you’re ready to go the extra mile to care and to show affection very much for another person.
There are three kinds of Love:
i.Eriotic Love: This exist between a boy and a girl, not necessarily because they want to get married, but because they want to gratify their sexual desire. The man may be giving the lady money in this kind of relationship, but then he’s only buying her body. This is not the kind of love that we expect Christians to demonstrate towards each other. this erotic love is the one that leads to an immoral relationship between two people, so the right word to use i the case is lust, not love. When a man and a woman are head to heels in lust, you see them chasing themselves relentlessly. That’s why there is no much engaging and disengaging amongst Christians, because the kind of love between them is not agape love, but erotic love. Erotic love is not true love. A brother who loves sister chidinma today and loves sister adanma tomorrow is in erotic love.
There are some pastors who demonstrate this kind of love to their members. This should not be so. Pastors ought not be burning in lust towards their members. Any pastors who sleeps with any of his members has reduce himself from a shepherd to a lame sheep. There are men who are married but love there mistress secretly more than their wives. Your marriage is the first responsibility that God has given you, and you have to take time to manage it. One thing that characterize erotic love is subtlety. In second Samuel 13:1-17 we find the story of Amnon and Tamar. Tamar who was a very beautiful and desirable girl was the half sister of Amnon, and because Amnom lusted after her seriously he decided to take her to bed, only he did not know how to make that happen. to be continued from Vol.2